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Into Your Head dot IE

Into Your Head podcast, Matchstick Cats comics and humour by Neal O'Carroll

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also on Archive.org
Into Your Head dot IE

Into Your Head podcast, Matchstick Cats comics and humour by Neal O'Carroll

Ebook: A Selection of Original Modern Nonsense Verse by Neal O’Carroll

Every classy website has a FREE E-BOOK. A selection of original modeern nonsense verse, by Neal O'Carroll. Cartoon image of head with "lid" open. Not intended for children.

After twenty-one and a half years I’ve figured out what every reputable website has, and what mine has been lacking. A free e-book:

A small collection of nonsense poems for adults, mostly from a short phase in the mid 2000s. I’d quite like to get back into writing these. What drugs should I take?

Collectors’ Note:
There will always be is at least one typo remaining in the eBook, so get your rare collectable faulty edition while you can. Unless I finally found them all this time, in which casey you’re out of luck.

Free e-Book:

Download ePub (e-Book)

or PDF Version

Also on Archive.org

Below Your Reading Level? Try These:

Writings – A to Z:


  • A Selection of Modern Nonsense Verse ( Free eBook by Neal O’Carroll )
  • About the Nike Worm, God and That Thing on the Moon
  • All Bill Gates’ Fault
  • An Apology, Tom Petty and a Cat who Cleans Windows
  • Anyway, Back to the Anteaters
  • At Least JFK had Access to Proper Libraries
  • Basements and Your Cat
  • Biting Furry Ass for Canada
  • Breaking the law is Already Illegal
  • Carbonated Bananas and Catswinging
  • Crossing the Road on Piano
  • Dick Whittington’s Cat’s Ass
  • Dirty little secret the statisticians don’t want you to know
  • Editoral: We Need to LIsten to Pigs when they Talk about Sausages
  • Emergency Wikipedia Substitute Facts
  • Facts about Ostriches, Eskimos and Camels
  • First ever blasphemous Two Cats walk into a Bar story
  • Goldilocks and the OJ Simpson trial
  • Gorrila Shaped Clouds and the Fire Brigade
  • Hans Christian Anderson’s Great Grandchildren
  • How I came to Hate Elephants
  • How to kill two birds with one stone
  • How to Play the Banjo: Parts 1 and 2
  • Hypocricy on the Bedroom Curtains
  • In which two cats walk into a bar and I admire Noah
  • In which two cats walk into a bar, but one of them is dead
  • Interpreting History through Parrots
  • Is Cloud Nine Being Downgraded?
  • It’s All Bill Gates’ Fault
  • Johnny Cash and the Big Black Things in Space (illustrated)
  • Killing the Laurel
  • Legislating for Marmalade Paws
  • Life in a Bank Vault
  • Life without a Belly Button
  • Martin Scorcese and Margarine Flies
  • Miss Piggy must not be allowed Control Space Time
  • My First Website
  • My Time in Jail
  • Neal’s Construction and Interior Design Tips
  • Octopuses are Right to Shun Milk
  • On Chernobyl and Modified Pets
  • On Elephants and Placebos
  • On Fashion and Incorrect Breakfasts
  • On Glass Ceilings and the Monkey Puzzle Blues
  • Photocopying and General Existence Tips
  • Plans for my Partial Death
  • Post Christmas Recipies
  • Problem with the Cheese
  • Reagan, Barcats and 7up
  • Reconstituted Sea Water
  • Red Bull Cola Motoring Politics
  • Red Chedder cheese and the Heimlick Maneouver
  • Sardine Manufacturers have got it all wrong
  • Schizophrenia’s part in my Imaginary Friend’s Downfall
  • Self Perpetuating Moth
  • September 11th 1999
  • Sir Walter Raleigh was an Asshole
  • Sitting on the Fence
  • So-Called Coffee Cake Consumption Norms
  • Some asshole is trying to invent a new type of Tsunami. Right now.
  • Stretching Yourself the Old Fashioned Way
  • Suffer not the vulgar fools who superfleursise constinents
  • Tale of deviant pigs, paraquat, Woody Allen, Leonardo de Caprio, second coming of Christ and two cats in a bar
  • Tantric Popcorn; International War Crimes Convention, the
  • Ten K Runs from the Post Office
  • The Case for Vegetarian T-Shirts
  • The Clerical Error
  • The Edgy Phase: Too soon to make fun of that fuckhead, Christopher Reeve? Okay, how about Jim Henson?
  • The Fallopian Tube of My Mind
  • The Problem with Creme Eggs
  • The Veteran Army Vet who looks after Veterans
  • This Site will not Stand in the way of your Cheeses and Omelettes
  • Turnips and the Aviation Industry
  • Two cats break into a matchstick factory
  • Two cats walk out of a bar in disgust. Also Banjos
  • Two Cats who got Replaced by a Clown
  • Two Cats, a Bar and a lonely Wasp
  • Two Cats, a Steam Train and a Criminal Investigation
  • Vague thing about Monkey and Crayons
  • Vomitoriums and the legal system
  • When Orangeade goes Underground
  • Why Cats can’t use Anti-perspirants, and I’m not an alcoholic
  • Why Cats Like Fish
  • Why Cats need to Shave their own Sheep
  • Why Chefs Can’t Fly and Horses get Shot
  • Why Cucumber Eaters can’t get Mortgages

| More Words |

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All Content by Month:

Latest Comics

Matchstick Cats comics - cat head logo
  • 10 May 2025 Matchstick Cats 680: Type Oh
  • 8 May 2025 Matchstick Cats 679: Impulse
  • 29 April 2025 Matchstick Cats 678: A Post Runt Society

More Matchstick Cats


Latest Podcasts:

Into Your Head podcast. Tripe on tap since 2006.
  • Show 851: The Keyboardist, the Judge and the Stenographer18 May 2025
  • Show 850: You’re Going to Love How You Look When You’re Drinking This12 May 2025
  • Show 849: Back to the Living Room Before It’s Too Late3 May 2025

More | Get Podcast | About

Latest Shorts:

Into Your Head SHORTS - on TikTok, YouTube or Instagram. Or here on site.
  • 13 May 2025 by Neal O'Carroll SHORTS 131: Your Own Personal Brain Cleaner
  • 13 May 2025 by Neal O'Carroll SHORTS 130: Ever Thought About Living Inside Your Dog's mouth?
  • 6 May 2025 by Neal O'Carroll SHORTS 129: The Prideful Astonaut's Sandwich
  • 6 May 2025 by Neal O'Carroll SHORTS 128: Dog Whistle Advisory!
  • 4 May 2025 by Neal O'Carroll SHORTS 127: Existential Horrors of Buckets and Tightropes

Get Into Your Head Podcast

Into Your Head podcast. Tripe on tap since 2006

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Content 2003-2025 Neal O'Carroll

CREATIVE COMMONS LICENSE for Into Your Head audio shows, Matchstick Cats comics and all writings and poetry on this site: license version BY NC ND 4.0 - attribution is required - suggested wording: "Neal O'Carroll - Hundreds of episodes / comics findable on Archive dot org."

In the far future?

In a flying car, perhaps? Some sort of 24th century podcast / cat comic archeologist? Site falling apart? Feeds broken? Everyone dead? No problem:

View main archives list on Archive.org

Permanent audio archives:

Into Your Head podcast on Archive dot org: Stash 1 | Stash 2 or just go to Archive dot org and search for: Into Your Head podcast | And try a Wayback Machine search for caches of my purpose-built Archives site located (in your past) at Archive.IntoYourHead.ie – Search |

Permanent comics archive:

Matchstick Cats the webcomic on Archive dot org located here.

NEW: Free e-Book:

"A Selection of Original Modern Nonsense Verse" by Neal O'Carroll
About | Dowload: ePub (recommended) or PDF | Also on Archive.org

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